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It’s fine to recognize your defensiveness or someone else’s, but unless you actually work on it, you’re not going to make any progress. It can be difficult but it’s not impossible.
People love to make declarative statements, like these: “White people suck,” “Men are rapists,” “Beck deserved the Album of the Year Grammy.” While saying these things makes it easy for you to share your thoughts, they’re kind of useless if you want to have a discussion that goes somewhere other than into a shouting match.
Asking questions instead of making statements is one major way to avoid arguments, spend less time dealing with stupid problems and make yourself much more likable. Here’s a few reasons why.
Fact is, most of the time when we talk, we don’t choose every single word that comes out of our mouths — that would take way to much damn work, and I got shit to do today. So we tend use a lot of code words, common sayings and other thoughtless words to get our points across.
When it comes to an argument, critique or other difficult conversation, thoughtless usually equals asshole-ish, rude and defensive. Here are a few of those code words, sayings and other thoughtless statements you need to remove from your dictionary.
At some point we all get a little defensive, but how we do it is different. Some people are in your face with it, others simply stay quiet and annoying – passive versus active. Either way, most of time, is a ninja with skill levels far over 9000.
It’s a beast but kicking defensiveness’ ass isn’t so hard. Its key weakness is that it’s only really effective when you don’t know it’s there. Luckily, it’s also kind of stupid, illogical, repetitive and leaves footprints everywhere.
Defensiveness is probably the biggest cause of “disagreements.” It’s an insidious little fucker who’ll drop into a conversation silently and try to disrupt any plans you had for a productive situation. If you let it stay around, it will accomplish its goal and probably make things worse for a long time after.
Luckily, you don’t have to concede defeat to that asshole. You can kick defensiveness’ ass. Although it’s pretty easy to learn how, be forewarned that it takes a lot of practice and understanding.
I miss my sub. Yes, I'm aware he's been gone for less than 90 minutes, but goddammit he is mine and I want him here.
There’s nothing like reminiscing about the first time you got fucked in the ass.
While we wait for the official LTASEX review, we can go ahead and get to how you can win an Intensity unit. All you have do is fill out the entry form below.
My partner and submissive currently is standing in a corner, facing the wall. He’s been bad, if you couldn’t guess. I got home about four hours ago and his behavior led to a fight that lasted three hours. His crime: being a little shit. I didn’t know it at first, but the fight wasn’t between him and me. The conflict, in fact, was between our inner drives for control.
When I started putting my penis in other people, I had one goal: destroy. I wanted to lay down the best dick game by banging like a jackhammer. While it worked, it came with a bunch of drawbacks.
Thankfully, though, I soon realized a slow stroke felt just as good and didn’t leave me in a sweaty mess.
