Sex is the key to everything! Since 2011, I’ve been bringing you the best in sex education. Let’s keep it running!
All in Personal Stories
My guy and I have some really satisfying sex — the best sex I’ve had in my life, really. It wasn’t always like that, though. In fact, we’ve had to work at making sure our sex is great for both of us. Of all the things we’ve tried, asking a single question has made the most difference:
Once the door is closed and he's out of view, I let my body fall against the foyer's hideous and painful stucco wall. It hurts. I laugh. I know I'm going to remember this winter.
Oh, shit... I'm fuckin' up.
I put together this guide for making scary decisions to help me and you.
After a bit of mental gymnastics, it occurred to me: “Holy shit, my ADHD is causing ED. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu … Jerome, you’re a dumbass; go take your Adderall right now.”
Picking my boyfriend up from the 1 East Psychiatric Wing of St. Joseph Mercy Hospital was more difficult than putting him in. Sure, he seemed to be in good spirits. Sure, the 49 cuts he put in his arm had healed, but during his weeklong stay, he was someone else’s problem. Now he was back in my life and I, finally, had to start dealing with my feelings.
Only once have I thrown up while giving a blow job, yet I think last night makes four times in a year my partner has managed to throw up all over my erect cock and lap. Although I’ve probably now been thrown up on during sex more than your average person, it never gets easier.
For most of that time, I was just sort of dealing with my emotions in the traditional way — screaming, yelling, obsessing over Pokémon, etc. Then I was gifted a “Harry Potter” branded journal and things began to change. I didn’t know it at the time, but writing about my feelings was going to change my life.
The man I married and I were once very in love. We were once very sexual. Hell, we were at one point even mutually financially stable. And if all of those pieces had stayed in place, we might have had a fighting chance. And I stress “might.” There is no winning formula for a lasting, happy relationship, but there are myriad formulae for doomed, unhappy ones.
So, ask yourself these questions:
I remember designing and ordering the invitations. And then I remember never being happy in our relationship again. It wasn’t a magical switch; planning the wedding didn’t make us unhappy, but getting married didn’t make us happy, either.
